Holy. Fucking. Shit. You guys. This fucking mask, goddamn.
I have terrible skin. I mean, any skin is better than none at all I guess but my skin is almost as bad as not having any. With age is has improved slightly, but I got some sort of weird hybrid mutant gene for having acne-covered, greasy skin that is inexplicably and irrevocably dry ALL AT THE SAME TIME. It goes so far beyond “combination skin” … I’m a scientific and biological anomalie.
BUT THIS MASK. I just started using an Origins face wash that is doing me wonders (Checks and Balances frothy face wash, thanks Birchbox), so when I got a full-size of that at Dillard’s yesterday I grabbed this as well. Hallelujah chorus of angels. Seriously. Most layer on - let dry - wash off stuff really strips my skin, leaves me red and blotchy, or just doesn’t do shit. After one use of this fucking mask my goddamn pores ARE SMALLER and my face is SOFT and EVEN and LOVELY. It’s gross how blown away I am by this product.
7:01 PM EST
I call this piece “Lonely Girl Grocery Shops” or maybe just GPOY…
I FORGOT VEGETABLE OIL. But I cat food was buy-one-get-one-free and that distracted me and filled my basket anyway. A+ for effort.
You wish you were here.
Alright fuck it. I’m going to Publix and I’m going to get some pizza, definitely Ben & Jerry’s fro-yo Half Baked, possibly some wings, and possibly some cookies or something out of the deal. Also vegetable oil because we’re all out and WHAT IF I WANT TO MAKE BANANA NUT MUFFINS LATER HUH.
When I come back I think I’m going to watch Portlandia and Pineapple Express.
Ahhhh I need someone to talk to about Shame ahhhhhhhhh someone talk to me.
/me all day every day about everything
teaforonesvp replied to your post: Someone come get pizza with me?
MOI.
UGH, YES. E, I constantly daydream about us hanging out. I believe we’ve discussed this before. I think we’d always have an excellent time because we have similar tastes, and if we went anywhere together we’d be pretty fast in agreeing whether or not it was worth our time, and if it wasn’t we’d just go get some frozen yogurt or something and maybe watch a film and be so happy.
alleysun replied to your post: Someone come get pizza with me?
DAMN YOU SAM I ALREADY MADE PLANS OR ELSE I WOULD BE THERE IN A HEARTBEAT. HATE YOU.
I WAS JUST GOING TO TEXT YOU BUT I FIGURED YOU’D HAVE PLANS ANYWAY. PSYCHIC TYPE SHIT. WHATEVER. NEXT TIME.
I need to not let cosmetics counter people rope me into trying like 20 products rapid fire. I took a nap when I got home from the mall (after washing the LAYERS of serums, lotions, and make-up off) and when I woke up from my nap my eyes were GOOPED SHUT. Obviously I had a terrible allergic reaction to the 3 layers of eye cream this woman put on me. Ugh. It was gross. It was like how you’d wake up if you have two pink eye infections, the flu, and seasonal allergies all at once. No thank you.
On the bright side, though, the NICEST people work at Express here and apparently Express pants fit me like a goddamn dream. My ass looks fantastical in the trouser jeans and black slacks I walked out with. Happy. I also got Clinique and Origins stuff because obviously that’s not going to glue my eyes shut every day.
Someone come get pizza with me?
I need pizza, a bottle of pinot noir, and someone to watch Lord of the Rings with me. Please?
